I recently got an email from Chase. He says he’s juggling going to graduate school full time, working full time, and he and his wife are now expecting twins. Now he said something that’s very important that I wanted to share with all of you. He says, and I quote, “I figure the road will be tough. Nothing that can’t be accomplished though.”
The Right Mindset for Twins
This mindset is amazing. Chase, if you and all the other dads who are expecting twins can have this mindset, it’s going to be a huge benefit to you and your family, because what you’re thinking is ultimately what’s going to happen. So if you go into it with a can-do positive attitude, it’s going to make a huge difference. Tell yourself, “It’s going to be hard, but I can do it. I can juggle these things effectively.”
Having twins is not easy. In fact, it’s really, really hard, and it’s the biggest challenge that you’ll probably have faced so far, but it is possible. People are having twins all the time. The twins survive. Mom and Dad survive, and it works out, and it will for you as well.
Prioritize to Survive with Twins
It’s also important to learn, from what Chase said, that you have to know what you’re getting into. You have to realize that you do have all these commitments, with work, or in this case with school, with family, and so what’s going to happen is that you have to know what you’re getting into. Some things are going to get squeezed. Some things are going to get dropped. But the most important thing is that you’re still able to provide for your family and take care of those twins.
It also means that you’re going to be able to take a glance at the future and say, “Okay, how do I need to prioritize these responsibilities?”
I’ve written about prioritizing things around your house, what you can let go, what needs to be taken care of. In this case, as you’re looking ahead as the dad, think about “Hmm, maybe I need to cut back on my school load” or “Maybe I need to cut back on my work hours” or “Maybe I need to adjust one thing or the other to make this whole puzzle work.”
This question was originally addressed on the Dad’s Guide to Twins Podcast Episode 40: Preparing While on Bed Rest, Early Twins, Positive Mindsets.
Picture by Don Graham