Benefits of a Nanny and Night Doula for Twins with Joe Sinnott – Podcast 215

Joe Rawlinson by Joe Rawlinson - October 22, 2020

Benefits of a Nanny and Night Doula for Twins with Joe Sinnott

Episode 215 of the Dad’s Guide to Twins Podcast Show Notes

Today we continue our father of twins interview series with Joe Sinnott, father of four including boy/girl twins! Listen as we explore his twin parenting journey, including:

  • Getting the news about expecting twins after rushing to the emergency room
  • Balancing other children during the twin pregnancy
  • Mom’s 70-pound weight gain during pregnancy and the recovery post-partum
  • Finding a nanny for the children (even before the twins were born)
  • Having a natural birth of twins
  • Getting night doulas to help with infant twins
  • When breastfeeding didn’t go as planned
  • Overcoming mastitis when feeding twins
  • Challenges of toddler twins that can’t fully communicate

Connect with Joe Sinnot:

Transcript

(Auto-generated – please forgive any typos)

Joe Rawlinson 0:22
Hello everybody and welcome to the 215th episode of the Dad’s Guide to Twins Podcast. This is Joe Rawlinson. Today we are continuing our father twins interview series with fellow twin dad and father of four, Joe Sinnott.

Today’s show is brought to you by twintshirtcompany.com where you’ll find dozens of T-shirts perfect for Father’s Day. Hint. Hint. You should order those right now at twintshirtcompany.com where we have shirts for dad, and for grandpa and even shirts for the twins themselves.

Today I’d like to welcome to the show fellow father twins, Joe Sinnott. Welcome to the show, Joe.

Twin Gender Predictor Calculator

Joe Sinnott 0:56
Thank you, Joe.

Joe Rawlinson 0:57
We’ve got an all Joe show today so it’s gonna be a good one. Joe, share a little bit about what your family situation was like when you found out that you were having twins.

Joe Sinnott 1:05
Sure. So when we found out we had already been the parents of what were then two year old boy and a five year old boy, and we were about six weeks into my wife’s pregnancy we knew she was pregnant. And we actually wound up in the ER she had some bleeding and we went in expecting the worst certainly the guidance of the doctors and it was in the ER that we found out that there wasn’t just one baby in there that was doing okay, there was actually two and you know, the bleeding was from a sub chorionic hematoma actually two of them. So that’s, you know, how we found out and you know, immediately you start thinking about, alright, well, you know, this is, this is gonna be an interesting journey while we have that two year old child at home and that five year old child who were certainly and still are very spirited and energetic and you know, already handled So, you know, we had our hands full with the two of them. And we jumped into the twin pregnancy with, you know, a little bit of a, an extra burden knowing that my wife was, you know, had these hematomas. And we needed to take things a little bit more carefully. So that’s how we began our journey. And that’s where we were at the time.

(RELATED: Expecting twins? Avoid these 4 critical mistakes expectant twin parents make.)

Joe Rawlinson 2:17
So how does the situation with the pregnancy, I was a different than your other boys you mentioned? Was there additional restrictions on her bed rest or things like that?

Joe Sinnott 2:25
There were restrictions early on. So with the hematomas, it wasn’t formal bed rest, but obviously, lots of restrictions on physical activity, which, when you have a two year old that already begins to sense that his world is getting rocked means, you know, she really shouldn’t be picking him up. And, you know, she really can’t run around with him or the other one as much as she would have liked and as much as they would have liked. So, you know, those are the biggest differences and that carried throughout the pregnancy and even post birth, really having these two other children with plenty of needs and trying to tend to them so, you know, by far that was the biggest circumstantial difference, if you will. Um, physically, the biggest difference was that, you know, this was pregnancy plus, and, you know, my wife, not a big fan of pregnancy, as most women aren’t. And this one, as you can imagine, just really kicked her. But it was really a toll on her body. She ultimately gained 70 pounds, which again is something to cheer and celebrate. But you know, the what that does and how limiting that can be was just was front and center throughout this. So, you know, that was the biggest difference is just trying to tend to these other children, while obviously trying to grow to healthy babies and keep them in there as long as possible.

Joe Rawlinson 3:36
Let’s talk about each of those aspects. One is taking care of your other boys during the pregnancy and also taking care of your wife. So what are some things that you did to help with the boys to help them get ready for the twins help them realize this current situation?

Joe Sinnott 3:49
So the biggest thing we did for the boys and it was, I’d say 95% for the boys was we decided early on, especially as we started digesting as much information out there as possible. That everyone who’s saying, you know, get as much help as you possibly can. We embrace that. And we realized that, you know, that didn’t mean getting as much help as you could, in the days, you know, leading up to the birth of the twins. But that meant, well, you know, well before that, so we actually went and hit the bullet and decided to invest in a nanny, something we never thought we would need or want. But knowing how limited my wife was going to be and knowing how important it was to maintain, you know, some positivity in the house, and certainly some attention on the boys. We thought that that was a good investment to make. So that’s what we did. We brought in a nanny, it was probably only six to eight weeks after we found out that we were having twins that she was on board and helping us out. And at the time, you know, we were fearful that this might be overboard. We really don’t need this. Obviously we can you know, we can muddle through this and be okay. But our feeling at the time was if we bring on this extra help if we bring on a nanny if nothing else, it To help us thrive and not just survive, and that’s what we kept telling ourselves as we, you know, began to, to shell out the money for that. And, you know, the funny thing is throughout the pregnancy, and then since then after the twins arrived, we realized that, you know, we really were still just surviving, even with the extra help. So that was by far the biggest thing we did to help the older boys transition as much as possible and understand that they’re still, you know, important. And even though mom can’t do as much as she could before, you know, we’re going to give you as much time and attention as possible.

Twin Gender Predictor Calculator

Joe Rawlinson 5:29
How did you find a nanny that was a good fit for your family?

Joe Sinnott 5:33
We went through an agency. You know, our first thought was the usual to carry calm and those type of things, but very quickly, it becomes very overwhelming. So fortunately, we made the decision on the recommendation of someone else, to contact someone who runs agency, which means she does a lot of legwork on finding the right fit, and finding, you know, some candidates and interviewing them and doing background checks and all of those formalities and again, it’s one of those things when you’re Deciding to make this investment when you’re bringing somebody into your home, the money that was spent up front to engage with the agency was, you know, the best thing that we could have imagined and what certainly and then have recommended that approach to other people who are facing similar challenges and opportunities of course to, to again, at least survive if not thrive. When things like this happen.

Joe Rawlinson 6:24
And what was your boys reaction to having a nanny come into the house?

Joe Sinnott 6:27
The one who is extremely outgoing and personable, had no problem. If you put anyone in front of him who’s willing to listen to him talk non stop, then you know, he’s good to go. So he definitely adjusted fine. The younger one, though, who was two going on three at that point. I’m still skeptical. You know, he’s still a little bit more shy than the other one. So it took some time. But again, the benefit of doing that only a couple months into the pregnancy, pregnancy is still with us. for six months to go is huge, because clearly when the twins arrived, at least, you know, even though it rocked his world, and even though it kicked him into another gear in terms of, you know, seeking attention, and you know, and you know, needing to feel like he was still important, clearly having months to adjust to the nanny, and this other person in the house was hugely beneficial. Because honestly, you know, he got it, he got it very early on that there’s these two babies growing inside of mom. And there are the reasons that she’s not the person she had been prior to that.

(RELATED: Still expecting twins? Will you be having two boys, two girls, or boy/girl twins? Answer these quick questions to see what several old wives’ tales claim you’ll be having….)

Joe Rawlinson 7:31
How did you divide responsibilities during the pregnancy between your wife, you and the nanny?

Joe Sinnott 7:36
The nanny, clearly, her primary function was to try to get the boys out of the house as much as possible so that my wife and I can handle a lot of the day to day because you know, nanny is still ultimately, you know, not there. 24 seven in this case, so, you know, I still have plenty of time with the boys, especially when I wasn’t at work. So, you know, it really allowed me to be a better father when I wasn’t working on the weekend. And on the evening so that I could be 100% with the boys when, again, when when the nanny wasn’t there. And in the meantime, my wife was able to find good windows. So in other words, you know, if the nanny was able to take the boys out to the park, for example, you know, when she got back if my wife was in a position where, you know, she could at least just read to the boys and give them 100% attention. You know, she was able to do that in spurts. So it was really just, you know, the nanny helping us be better parents. And fortunately, we found somebody with a lot of experience. And that very much came through as she knew that was her role. She wasn’t there to replace us, if you will, especially since it was it was kind of awkward cuz my wife was home at the time. And you know, in many cases, the nanny is there to sort of, you know, act as a parent when the parents not there, whereas in this case, it was very much supplemental. So it was a huge blessing that, you know, she was able to do the tasks when basically either I wasn’t there or my wife wasn’t physically capable of it. That allowed us to be 100% parents during those windows when we could be.

Joe Rawlinson 8:59
We found out we were having our twin girls, we had a tumor boys as well. We’ve found a neighbor, there’s a girl across the street who was like a teenager and we’d have her come over in the afternoons and play with our older boys just so my wife could, you know, have a rest, because like you’re describing all of our energy was being used on our energetic toddlers really. And while she’s trying to grow these babies, which is a full time job in itself, so I recommend to listeners even if even if you can’t get a nanny full time, you know, just getting a couple hours relief for mom is a huge win. Definitely during the pregnancy. So what about health issues for mom? How did she progress through the pregnancy to delivery?

4 Critical Mistakes Expectant Twin Parents Make

Joe Sinnott 9:38
So overall, it was a healthy is a very healthy pregnancy. So once we got past the point where the hematomas had done whatever they do and sort of absorbed themselves in and you know, that threat was gone. Fortunately, the twins grew evenly. My wife was not, again, not thrilled to be pregnant with As many aren’t so she was sick and she was, you know, lethargic. And as I said earlier, she gained 70 pounds, which is a good thing. So we wound up with, you know, to full term, or at least as far as they would let us go, babies that were both seven pounds one ounce so she did her job and you know, looking back again, regardless of the cost of what we spent to get us to that point, there’s no question that having that extra help and allowing her to have that extra rest and grow those twins you know, helped it be a healthy pregnancy and helped her get as far as she did and help those twins you know, grow to you know, to to their full weight and come out as healthiest could be.

Joe Rawlinson 10:40
are twins boys girls are one of each?

Joe Sinnott 10:42
one of each boy and a girl. Nicholas arrived first baby a and then 16 minutes after him was baby Maria.

Joe Rawlinson 10:52
So is this a natural birth or C section.

Joe Sinnott 10:54
This was an actual birth. Of course with twins. Even a natural birth means in many cases you’re delivering in an operating room in case something goes wrong. So, you know, that was a pretty drastic change from our prior to children. Our first was more conventional in hospital. But the second one, we actually wound up at a birthing center. So you know, just midwives no intervention, you’re there for a couple hours. And they, you know, I think they kicked us out four hours after our son Anthony was born. And so this was obviously a very different experience with you know, probably 20 people in the room and you know, two sets of pediatricians and all the doctors and, you know, very different experience. So even though it was natural, which of course was was a benefit and a blessing in terms of recovery. It was still a very, you know, very different existence, if you will, than we were used to in having our children.

(RELATED: Still expecting twins? Will you be having two boys, two girls, or boy/girl twins? Answer these quick questions to see what several old wives’ tales claim you’ll be having….)

Joe Rawlinson 11:46
So it sounds like trying to have a natural birth was the plan all along with the twins. And sometimes plans go awry with twin deliveries. So it sounds like he had a supportive medical team that was willing to give that a shot not before she down the road, have a C section.

Joe Sinnott 12:01
Absolutely. And I think part of that was, again, we had assumed initially when we knew she was pregnant that we would go the midwife center, the birthing center route again, and have a midwife have a doula present and, you know, kind of do things again, on our own terms. Obviously, he wants new twins came all that went out the window. But fortunately, there is a group of midwives at one of the hospitals here in Pittsburgh where we’re at, and they really helped get us to that point. So they really helped us stay positive and, and get to the point where Yeah, there’s no reason that, you know, you control what you can control. And if you get to that point, you might be able to avoid a C section. And fortunately, we did. So again, unfortunately, they they arrived, you know, very little intervention during the birth, they did have to go in and kind of twist my daughter a little bit there at the end, which, unfortunately meant she wound up not having her own birthday. So we went in there and no knowing that was going to be a natural birth and there’s going to be probably some time in between the Have them, we actually wound up in the operating room, the delivery room, if you will. It was about I think, 20 minutes to midnight, and the first baby came along and everybody in there was excited that everybody was excited that they were going to see, you know, many people hadn’t seen twins with two different birthdays. And, you know, they thought it was going to happen. But my, my daughter had different plans, and she decided to start twisting herself around and my wife obviously followed orders and kept pushing. So unfortunately, that meant she showed up at 11:58pm. And the other part of that while you know, we had embraced this, this new experience of that, hey, we’re going to be in the hospital, we’re gonna have all these resources, we’re going to get a nice long break from our children. Those two minutes also meant that we had one last night in the hospital because our first night started when the babies were born, even though it was late at night and we didn’t actually get back to our, our actual room until I think about four in the morning. So again, all the things you you know, you can plan you can joke about you just got to take everything with a grain of salt and And realize that you have limited control. But at the end of the day, it’s you know, it’s all worth it. Obviously, when you have two healthy happy babies there and, and you’re heading home with them.

Joe Rawlinson 14:09
That’s great that they were born healthy, good size, like you mentioned. Were you able to go home shortly? In a couple days after that or were they stuck in the hospital for a little while?

Joe Sinnott 14:20
No, they were, they were as healthy as could be. So we were, we gave birth again, it was late Friday night, and we were home by Sunday afternoon. So no time in the nick, you know, extra interventions after the birth. So again, really, really very lucky to kind of begin our post birth twin journey in that manner.

Twin Gender Predictor Calculator

Joe Rawlinson 14:41
The twins are here and you bring them home now you have to adjust to life with twins, mom’s recovery and balancing your other two children. How was that transition for you?

Joe Sinnott 14:49
I think the first couple hours weren’t too bad. We had you know, we had a you know, both my mother and my wife’s mother were there and able to take care of the kids but um, you know, I think we got through the first night. Okay. But by the second night it was, you know, it was it was a different story. You know, it was the older boys again, they were, you know, they weren’t gonna show us any mercy. So another thing that we had lined up again, with this theme of really embracing any help you can get, we wound up having night doulas. So, women coming to the house, to be there overnight to watch the twins to help rotate them through the, you know, to my wife for breastfeeding to change diapers. And again, you know, as much as at the time we were fearful that that might be overboard. I could not recommend that enough. Having somebody that can be there, you know, even if it’s just a couple nights a week makes a world of difference. So that certainly helped with the transition. You know, having someone there at night to not only functionally help hold the babies and do some of the logistical things to get them fed and get them cleaned, but also there as support to help really Coach us coach, my wife, you know, through a lot of the things that go on in the first couple weeks after you have a baby, let alone two babies. So that really helped with the transition, you know, as much as possible as much again as you can prepare for. For something like this.

Joe Rawlinson 16:14
Having someone to help you during the night is a huge lifesaver. While we didn’t have a doula we did have some at least one family member staying with us for almost two months. And that was able to put myself and my wife and the third person in a rotation where at least one of us will get to sleep during the night, you know, every couple of nights, which was enough to keep us going enough to sustain us. You mentioned breastfeeding was your wife able to successfully breastfeed the twins?

Joe Sinnott 16:41
For a very short period of time. So with our first two children, she exclusively breastfed they went until at least two years old. So that was the plan going into this and you know, for I don’t know, at least the first week it was going okay, but then we did have some weight gain concerns with this. Twins, which meant starting to supplement with formula. And then, you know, we, you know, we got into that that was okay. We started seeing the benefits of being able to supplement and having other people help with that even though that was new for us. But the real challenge came, maybe, gosh, maybe two or three weeks in where she came down with mastitis. And you know, if people out there don’t know what mastitis is, it’s essentially blocked milk ducks which then can become infected, which caused tremendous pain and could, you know, lead to needing antibiotics. And fortunately for us, we were used to mastitis my wife had recurrent mastitis with our prior children. So once this reared its head again, we knew what to expect we knew it was bad. And you know, combined with the supplementing that we were already doing, knowing that my wife just couldn’t keep taking antibiotics getting to the point where the antibiotics weren’t enough. Working, winding up in the hospital because the mastitis was so bad, the time came to start weaning the children certainly much earlier than we would have anticipated. And you know, with any child, certainly breastfeeding can be very emotional, very personal. And clearly us having been on one complete end of the spectrum with breastfeeding for an extended period of time and then transitioning to this were in really pretty short order. We were transitioning to exclusive formula. You know, that was a challenge. But again, having people around especially having those night, doulas who were a great resource for this was tremendous. And it really helped us see all the positives of transitioning to formula and you know, how we were able to really bring in, you know, the whole family and other people in terms of feeding including myself, and I had one thing too with mastitis it’s almost a catch 22 as well because when you stop breastfeeding because it’s it’s painful or you can’t that can exacerbate mastitis for a short period of time because the best way to It is to try to keep, you know, keep the flow going and keep pumping and feeding. So working through that with one child was tough working through that with two was really, it was really a struggle at times.

Joe Rawlinson 19:12
Some of the things that you shared are good reminder that when we’re planning for our ideal situation with twins, sometimes it works out. And then sometimes you have to change course and change course rapidly. Like you mentioned, we were talking about having a natural birth, which is often a wish of many parents. And sometimes because the twins are in the right position, or there’s other issues. That doesn’t happen for them. And in your case, it worked out. And with breastfeeding. You like us we wanted to breastfeed twins, and we had to change course, because of the circumstances. And so you have to be kind of flexible and on your toes a lot to adapt. Because what worked with with previous children, like you described yours are we the same case with ours? It worked before Why wouldn’t it work this time? Well, this time is different. You just have to have to be flexible are some of the other big, maybe emotional or milestone challenges. Have you had during those first couple months or a year with the twins?

Joe Sinnott 20:03
you know, working with my wife through all of this was, first of all the, you know, clearly the emotions. Fortunately, she didn’t get to the point of having postpartum depression. But, you know, with twins, it’s a lot higher risk. And you hear of plenty of parents who you know how to deal with postpartum, really bad when they have twins, and then they might have go on to have other children and it’s not there at all. And I think we saw some of that so it was far more intense the emotions of all of this and the hormones, everything that comes with it, you know, because we had twins. And again, you couple that with having the two other children running around being demanding and it just really exacerbates things. So just the general emotional stuff is one thing. I think one specific item that really still is a topic of conversation and something that I find myself coaching my wife on, is really the impact that having twins had on her body. So again, very fortunate to have an extremely healthy pregnancy very fortunate that she was able to gain seven pounds very fortunate that she was able to have these healthy children. But what that means now is, you know, her stomach, quite frankly isn’t, you know what it used to be? And even doctors say, well, it’s not going to be you could work out four hours a day. And you know, that’s just how it’s going to be unless you went the surgical route. And, you know, that’s one thing to hear from a doctor and almost, you know, refreshing saying, well, there’s really nothing you could do about it, but, you know, emotionally that’s a, that’s a big thing. That’s a very sacrificial thing. So, you know, being there as the husband and reminding her of how awesome it was that she stretched her body, you know, literally and physically and figuratively, I should say, to get to that point is amazing. But that’s still something you look at and you start, you know, in moments when you’re overwhelmed saying, Wow, is this all worth it? You know, this is crazy, you know, even today with them. A couple of days away from their second birthday, things are still incredibly crazy and you really I can kind of go down a road and just say was it all worth it and being there as a spouse, and helping remind her of course that it was and and it’s great and what a great job she did is so incredibly important through all of this.

Joe Rawlinson 22:14
That’s a wonderful point. Moms give up so much to bring children into our families and to nurture and care for them. And it has so many different layers, like you mentioned, as of course, physical layer on the body and emotional and mental struggles as well. And it falls on us as a partner to you know, support them the best that we possibly can, you know, still love them along that journey. Now that your twins are almost two you mentioned, what are some of the milestones or challenges that you’re having right now with them?

Joe Sinnott 22:44
It’s the challenge that you have with all children have them still not being able to completely verbalize what they want. And what that means for us right now is that one of them seems to be shrieking, not just yelling or screaming or crying or whining but shrieking at any given time. moment, you know, to the point where my watch my Apple watch here is, you know, giving me warnings because the decibel levels too high and I’m gonna, you know, run up against OSHA regulations if I if I don’t go and seek some hearing protection. So the shrieking right now is probably the thing that really plays on us. Coupled with of course, the impacts right now as we record this under quarantine of everyone being in the house. And, you know, my wife has taken on the burden of the, the homeschooling for the older two children. I’ve been playing the role of babysitter for the twins. And, you know, one of the challenges is still that they undoubtedly and understandably, you know, they want mom and, you know, it’s it’s almost like a replay of what we dealt with with the older kids when the twins came along. And, you know, all of that, together with these two twins who are getting increasingly independent, you know, can really be challenging, especially when again, you hear constant screaming when the other two boys are are constantly talking and when my wife And I can barely communicate throughout the day in more than, you know, five seconds spurts.

Joe Rawlinson 24:05
Yeah, so hard when they can’t express themselves. And it’s hard for you to understand what they need, what has worked in that situation where maybe they want mom, but you’re the, you’re the guy on the job right now, what has worked in helping engage them and appease them in the moment?

Joe Sinnott 24:20
If there’s any opportunity to, you know, for, for my wife to take a break from whatever she’s doing to at least give her one. You know, that’s the best possible thing. It certainly makes it easier. I think when the weather’s nicer, and when you can coke some of the other ones outside but, you know, even five minutes of one on one time, you know, with one twin and my wife is rejuvenating for the twins. So trying to work that in without maybe completely disrupting or appending everything else that’s going on and all the competing priorities is key. So we try to do that as much as possible. But like most things in life, you can only you know, you can always schedule and plan so much so Looking for those windows, and not trying to just whisk them away and hide them from my wife. That’s the type of thing that we need to avoid because, again, they’re perceptive, it’s you know, the more you fight them on their ultimate desire to hang out with their mother, you know, the more intense they’re going to get. So getting into those looking for those windows and helping ensure that they get that bond is has been key.

4 Critical Mistakes Expectant Twin Parents Make

Joe Rawlinson 25:21
How’s the relationship between your older boys and the twins evolved?

Joe Sinnott 25:25
The older boys relationship has been pretty consistent. I think he’s been enjoying them around, but he’s also kind of in his own world, and if they’re not really impacting him, it doesn’t matter as much are now five year old, however, he still, you know, he still sees that when we go and tend to the twins because their needs seem higher at the moment. You know, he sees that that’s taking away from his needs. And, you know, that strains his relationship with him at times and, quite frankly, his behavior. He started acting out more. He was the sweeter of the two children, if you will, but he became, you know, much more aggressive. And he even got to the point and this wasn’t immediate, but you know, he got to the point where he really, you know, he at least, like one twin and he would say the boy Nicholas, you know, that was his favorite, and he would homeschool on the attack against Maria, the girl and, you know, to the point where we really had to watch him closely. So you know, that’s been something we’ve we continue to keep our eyes on. Obviously, there’s plenty of times where they’ll laugh and there’ll be jovial and will be fun, but but, you know, at the, at the drop of a hat, or at the moment that one of the twins steal something that is our as our five year olds, then you know, things can change pretty quickly. So, you know, pretty different, I would say, for the for the now five year old and now eight year old in terms of how they interact with the twins.

Joe Rawlinson 26:52
And we’ve seen similar with our kids so that relationships kind of evolved over time. One of our boys when the girls were born He just didn’t even care he was in his own little world. And the other one has always wanted to be the helper and ebbs and flows and changes over the years, the relationship and other all in between two teenage age groups. So that has its own hormone-induced imbalances and, and so we do get some of that same shrieking that you’re describing, if you’re toddlers, even though our kids are older. So this season of your life is just preparing you for the future. So you mentioned just you and your wife. So at what point did you stop having a nanny for the kids?

Joe Sinnott 27:27
So we stopped. It was August of this past year. So we had had her for about 20 months total, which included just over a year of with the twins themselves post birth. So we transitioned away from her some of that was brought upon by transition that I had at work so I had been working full time corporate job away from the house and was going to be losing that job and transitioning to life at home, working from home. And, you know, the time then came both from a financial standpoint and you know, from the fact that I was going to be able to help much more, albeit in maybe an uncertain manner, and certainly not as effective as, as an experienced nanny. But, you know, that time came for us to, unfortunately part ways with a nanny and and I became in many ways the, the Manny, if you will, which continues to this day, even as we try to stand up our own business and adjust to working from home and all of that. So, you know, we’re, it feels like we’ve been in transition, of course, since our firstborn came eight plus years ago, but you know, very much a transition away from that experience. And from having that as a tremendous resource that, you know, was getting us to the point where we were just starting, I feel like the thrive so maybe a couple steps back in that regard, but plenty of lessons learned in terms of, you know, what worked and what didn’t work and understanding the dynamics of our children better because we had that extra help.

Joe Rawlinson 28:54
So let’s talk a little bit about starting up your own business, what have you found works for you now, to kind of balance that professional hat and the dad hat at the same time?

Joe Sinnott 29:04
The most effective approach has been trying to find time where you can do 100% on work related stuff, and 100% on family. And certainly that’s a, you know, that was a realization that I had in my prior roles when, you know, you’re you still try to avoid getting into, you know, emails late at night and phone calls and trying to find a time for them when your kids don’t have to see your work and your kids don’t have to see you paying 50% attention to them. But now being at home, it’s, it’s even more in your face, because theoretically, I could work 24 seven here, but theoretically, I can spend 100% of my time with the children as much as I would love that. So really trying to split that time and know that I can focus 100% on one thing and 100% on the other as much as possible. And that really helps maintain stress levels that helps set expectations and quite frankly, it helps the relationship between me and my wife. So She doesn’t have to feel like she’s interfering and stepping on work time, even when it’s, you know, seems somewhat vague because I’m down in the basement trying to stand up a new business, but it also helps her knowing that she’s gonna have this window where I am 100% with the kids, and she’s able to do you know, whatever she needs to get done to support the family does do those things. So trying to put your time is, is has been the thing that has worked the most, at least until March of course when most of that time went out the window and we’re balancing remote schooling during this pandemic period. And again, you know, the non-stop nature of the twins.

Joe Rawlinson 30:36
Well, tell us a little bit about your your new business and podcasts that you have.

Joe Sinnott 30:41
The new business on the heels of 14 years of having mostly engineering and technical roles again, working for larger companies, I decided to shift gears and stand up an executive coaching business. So still leveraging technical background but embracing a lot of the things that again, played out at home, in terms of coaching children coaching my wife through things being coached by her and again, a lot of the support that we had, including the doulas, so embracing that sort of personal coaching, and really focusing on some of the professional coaching that exists in corporate America with teams and organizations trying to accomplish big tasks, because it became very clear when I was faced with losing my job, that those things are all related. So I decided to stand up a business that helps people, you know, be more successful and try to lead a more sustainable existence, particularly, again, from the work side, but acknowledging that you can’t separate a lot of the principles that make you effective at work and a lot of the principles that make you effective as a father. So the business is one thing it’s waiting partners with the idea of helping people consciously go through life and make decisions and not unwittingly limit their ability to contribute at the highest levels and see sustaining Success. And along with that, as you mentioned the podcast, which is the energy detox, you know, that is an avenue as a leadership podcast to again blend in some of the business themes and some of the real elements that help people thrive in business and blend them with very real and practical things that help at home as well. Because the two definitely play off of each other and are so important to recognize that they are very much related.

Joe Rawlinson 32:26
Excellent. And if listeners want to connect with you, what’s the best way to reach out?

Joe Sinnott 32:29
my website, wittingpartners.com. And there you can find information about the business about me about the podcast, and certainly contact information. And I’m happy to connect via email via LinkedIn and always happy to have conversations about both my experience as a twin dad, and you know, the experiences of anyone as a working parent trying to balance you know, balance those challenges that are constant.

Joe Rawlinson 33:00
And they are constant for sure. Well, Joe, we were really grateful that you joined us today on the show and sharing your story with us. Thank you so much.

Joe Sinnott 33:07
Thank you, Joe. And I appreciate all that you’ve done since before the twins came along and me and my journey and certainly in the many ways that you help future and current twin dads as well.

Joe Rawlinson 33:16
I hope you enjoyed that conversation today with Joe about his journey as a twin father. If you want to connect with him, I’ll link up to all the things he mentioned over at twindadpodcast.com in the show notes for this episode.

Joe Rawlinson 33:27
If you’d like to share your story as a twin dad on the show, please reach out to me on Instagram or Twitter @twindadjoe or you can email me [email protected]

Joe Rawlinson 33:37
Again today’s show is brought to you by twintshirtcompany.com where you’ll find dozens of T shirts designed specifically for you, fathers of twins So you should get yourself a gift for Father’s Day or tell your partner that you would love a shirt from twintshirtcompany.com for Father’s Day. Thank you so much for listening and I will see you next time.

Subscribe to the Podcast

To subscribe to the podcast, please use the links below:

Share Your Thoughts

Please let me know what you think of this episode of the podcast, you can contact me with any questions or comments or leave a comment on the blog.

If you enjoyed this episode, please leave a rating and review on iTunes by clicking here. It will help other parents of twins find the show!

Download the Podcast

Download the podcast in .mp3 format (right click and “save as…”)

Further Reading

Dad's Guide to Raising Twins book
Don't forget to pick up a copy of the definitive guide to raising twins. "Dad's Guide to Raising Twins" was written for fathers of twins to help guide you through the first several years with twins. Click here to learn more about the book and get your copy.

Leave a Comment